Sick and tired of malingering high school and college students claiming to have ADD/ADHD because they’re bored, can’t (don’t want to or won’t do their homework) or just want drugs. The amount of chemicals produced each year to make drugs like mixed-amphetamine salts (Adderall), lisdexamfetamine (Vyvanse), dextroamphetamine (Dexedrine), methylphenidate (ritalin & concerta) and dexmethylphenidate (Focalin) are strictly controlled. There have been shortages in recent years of these drugs, drugs that those of us who actually have ADD/ADHD (and have hours of neuropsychiatric, psychotherapeutic, and psychiatric testing and interviewing to back that up) REALLY FUCKING NEED.
Stop freaking being drug fiends and be happy you know what it feels like to be normal.
Americans love drugs. This is no secret. We as a people love to get fucked up. There are regional and socioeconomic differences in our drugs of choice however. This is a set of some neat info graphics illustrating this point.
I ruin things
I boldly build beautiful relationships
ties that bind
from seemingly nowhere
I decide to burn it all
to push away what I hold so dear.
I may have lost the best friend I’ve ever had.
I hate 99% of people.
Religion is a cancer.
The vast majority of people are ignorant to the fact that the human race beyond simply being fallible is actually the problem.
After a year and a half of grad school misery in Kansas, I chose to cut my losses and came to the conclusion that what I was studying would not help me reach my ultimate career goal of helping people directly. Research helps people but its just so far off from actually helping people. There are only a few things I miss about Kansas: 1) my best friend in the program H. she was also from NY. 2) Having my own place (living with my parents at the moment and it is embarrassing. 3) Being able to smoke a cigarette whenever I so choose. Parents are parents but I don’t need a goddamn lecture for my own personal choices.
Lastly, a word of warning…People in the midwest are often perceived as being very friendly and nice…that perception is wrong. They’re all fake as shit and crazy judgmental.
Nice to find someone with at least one interest in common with me.
I don’t know why I did it. I really don’t. I have no reason. My behavior is inexplicable. I ruined the best thing to ever happen to me. The worst part though is that I hurt her.
On the day it all went wrong. When she discovered what I had done, I was distraught. I knew as I know now that I would never see her again. It broke me. And broken I remain. She was right when she wrote to me that I had some serious fucking issues, because I do.
I don’t know if it is luck or not, but the fact that I am capable of writing today is amazing…I tried to harm myself that day because I could not bare to look at myself in the mirror and I still can’t.
I don’t expect that she will ever forgive me, and she has every right to hate me forever. I just wish she knew how sorry I am that I threw away what we had for something that meant absolutely nothing.
And I can pretty much guarantee none of you really gave a shit that I have been gone for so long, fuck I don’t even care that I haven’t written in forever. I mean, I write every day, but I completely forgot about this blog. Oh well…fuck it, may as well pick up from where I’m at now.
So…I quit graduate school.
Yeah that happened. Couldn’t manage to pass the required quantitative methods course the second time around, so I dropped out right after failing (impressively, I might add) that particular exam for the second year in a row.
Best decision I’ve ever made.
However, I have been looking for employment for approximately a month, maybe more, and have had no luck.
So, the university I attend has declared that school will be closed tomorrow due to snow (which has yet to even start to fall). Unfortunately due to my research, I won’t be able to enjoy any extra sleep on this impromptu day off which is just fucking fantastic.
Some tomorrow morning at 7am, when there is nearly a foot of snow on the ground I will be trudging through the snow to analyze the data from my research subjects.